Love and Why it Matters
First, I want to welcome all the new people who signed up for my blog postings. Thanks for visiting my writing space. I will never take for granted that you click on my site and read what I write. Please feel free to comment and ask me questions–anytime.
CONGRATULATIONS TO THE WINNER Carol V. on winning a personally designed pink mother of pearl bracelet with a lotus charm. I hope you are enjoying it!
I offered it as a giveaway in promoting my website and my new upcoming memoir, The Sensitive One, on August 24 th. Those who know me know that I love designing and making jewelry, simple everyday pieces with meaning. Most of my jewelry is hand-made with natural gemstones. I love the importance of all the gems so much I want to share them with others. So be on the lookout for another giveaway soon!
So why does love matter? For me, I think it is the only thing that DOES matter. When I think back to my chemo days... in my bed at night so tired and worn out from chemo. I thought about all the people in my life that matter to me. That was when I vowed that spending time with the people I love would be my focus for the rest of my life. And I want to be present with each one. To be loved and to experience love is one of life's greatest joys.
We are all worthy of love: every one of us.
I didn't always feel worthy of love. In my twenties and early thirties, I struggled to accept the love of anyone other than my children. I wanted to hide inside a bubble with them forever. It felt great to mother them like I was not mothered. I knew how to love them immensely. It was the love from them that I held onto with arms open wide. Their hugs and adoration love got me through a challenging time in my life. Loving them came easy to me.
Why wasn't it easy for me to accept the love of a partner? Looking back on it (reflection is always great :)), my one male role model growing up was my father. While I adored him when he wasn't drinking, those days would eventually become few and far between. I clung to the first person that showed me attention. I mistakenly took that as love.
In my twenties and thirties, I went through years of therapy. I attended Adult Child of Alcoholics meetings regularly. I bought a small meditation book titled Worthy of Love. I read it morning and night. I eventually believed that I was worthy. And, of course, that's when real love came my way.
Here is a quote and meditation page from the book:
Unconditional love corresponds to one of the deepest longings, not only of the child, but of every human being.
~ Erich Fromm
Feeling the need to be perfect to ensure we'll be loved is as familiar as the robin's whistle heralding spring. Am I too fat to be loved? Do people think I'm dumb when I speak out? Mistakenly, we feel unique in our struggles with our fears oif inadequacy, thus we fail to find comfort among friends and strangers who share our selected fears.
If we could understand our sameness with others, we'd be able to feel the gentle urging within to acknowledge their presence, their smiles, their messages which are assuredly meant for our ears only. Their desire, like our own, is for the promise of love. Unconditional love wants expression; pass it around and watch it return tenfold.
I came across this:
You are worthy of love. You are worth more than your fears. You are worth more than your self-doubts. You are worth more than the negative thoughts and vibes and things being thrown at you from seemingly every corner of the universe sometimes.
I found my husband when I wasnt looking :) We will be celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary this Fall. He is the true love of my life!!
So, when love comes calling-I suggest that you answer that call :)